My Elderly Parent Doesn’t Want to Go to a Nursing Home. What Should I Do?

elderly woman with her nurse

Whether we like it or not, we will all grow old. Our skin will get wrinkly, our vision will be blurry, and we will experience limited bodily capabilities. Our memories will also fail us at some point, and the thought of leaving the world soon due to old age can be quite a scary thing.

Old age is a constant part of our lives. No matter how scary it can be to reach old age, we should be comforted by the fact that we can do something about the inevitable effects of aging. Aside from taking care of our health while we are still young, we should consider checking out granny flats in Melbourne in case relatives and family members won’t be around to take care of us later on.

When old family members become stubborn

People tend to be stubborn, the more they age. One reason is that most older adults do not want to become invalid and useless in the eyes of their loved ones. No wonder there are a lot of cases wherein a lot of older people reject help from other people and attempt to do things on their own.

This situation also happens when you try to convince your elderly folks to stay in a senior care facility or avail of a caregiver. If you are one of those who struggle with this kind of situation, you are not alone. Experts say that it is one of the most challenging things adult children often face.

Elderly woman sitting on a wheelchair and being pushed by a nurse

Frustrating as it can be, we should try to understand why they are acting like that in the first place. According to experts, a lot of older people think they went through a lot and survived through it all. They might have lived through tough times and reached the age where they are now.

A lot of older adults also experience cognitive decline, which can affect their mood and how they interact with others. This can add fuel to the fire, which can be frustrating for both parties nonetheless. Sadly, this is the reality for many families out there. It can be frustrating, but we can only do so much.

Convincing older adults to accept help

You might encounter screaming and hurtful words while convincing your elderly folks to seek help from a caregiver. Taking care of your older parents is a noble thing. However, you should still prioritize and take care of yourself while you still can. Here are some things you can do to lessen the tension between the both of you:

  • Start the topic as early as possible. Make sure to segue the topic as naturally as possible without seemingly forcing your old folks to comply with your wish.
  • Dig deeper and ask your parents why he or she is not open (yet) to have a caregiver. Learn to understand their situation and put yourself in their shoes.
  • You have to try the compassionate deception approach. For example, you can tell your elderly parents to try out the senior care service in a limited time. Then eventually, you extend it until such time that your elderly parent seems to be well-adjusted to the living condition.

No matter how difficult older adults can be, we should still show empathy to them. The transition can be challenging to them, so we should understand the changes they are going through. We might be like them when we become old, and that is why we should treat our elderly loved ones with twice the love and compassion.

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